The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
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