Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize
