If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
