you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Holy sore nipples Batman
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Randomize
