I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
