At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
