The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize
