No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize
