oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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