She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
Randomize
