i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize
