ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
Boobs are out for the taking
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize