I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
Randomize
