Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Randomize
