I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
Randomize
