This girl is more easily done than said...
How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
Randomize
