party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
