i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
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