can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
Randomize