It wouldn't matter if you are Jesus Christ himself, you are not getting into the bar tonight
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
