Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
one might say we're banned from that church
im about as happy as oj after his trial
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
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