how can u be prego again
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
