Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
I need moral support for this bender
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize
