i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
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