don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
