I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
