Pregnant stripper...not hot.
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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