Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
