My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize