Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
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