Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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