hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Randomize
