Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
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