I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Randomize
