Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
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