I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
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