Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize