Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
just found out that she named her cat after me.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
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