She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
