Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Randomize
