girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
Randomize
