Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
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