I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
I believe in your delicious
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
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