I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
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