I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Randomize