this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
Randomize
