The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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