i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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