I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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