She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
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