Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
The uberlube is also flammable
Randomize
